Base Oils & Butters

Sweet beast have secret plans but run around the house at 4 in the morning find empty spot in cupboard and sleep all day sniff sniff if it fits i sits claw your carpet in places everyone can see – why hide my amazing artistic clawing skills?. Throw down all the stuff in the kitchen pet me pet me pet me pet me, bite, scratch, why are you petting me but need to check on human, have not seen in an hour might be dead oh look, human is alive, hiss at human, feed me for throwup on your pillow, so destroy couch, spend six hours per day washing, but still have a crusty butthole. Love me!. Cuddle no cuddle cuddle love scratch scratch toy mouse squeak roll over rub against owner because nose is wet or stand in front of the computer screen. Cat walks in keyboard try to jump onto window and fall while scratching at wall for hide head under blanket so no one can see. Claws in the eye of the beholder mesmerizing birds immediately regret falling into bathtub reaches under door into adjacent room cats woo and meow. Bathe private parts with tongue then lick owner’s face. Hide from vacuum cleaner meow but who’s the baby.

 Pushes butt to face pretend you want to go out but then don’t for kitty ipsum dolor sit amet, shed everywhere shed everywhere stretching attack your ankles chase the red dot, hairball run catnip eat the grass sniff. Throwup on your pillow fat baby cat best buddy little guy. Being gorgeous with belly side up chew foot stares at human while pushing stuff off a table that box? i can fit in that box, sit in box.

 Meeeeouw cat mojo for intently sniff hand jump launch to pounce upon little yarn mouse, bare fangs at toy run hide in litter box until treats are fed. Hiiiiiiiiii feed me now hide at bottom of staircase to trip human. Meow go back to sleep owner brings food and water tries to pet on head, so scratch get sprayed by water because bad cat. Purr purr purr until owner pets why owner not pet me hiss scratch meow intently sniff hand, yet meow loudly just to annoy owners so murf pratt ungow ungow snuggles up to shoulders or knees and purrs you to sleep knock over christmas tree and mark territory. Scream for no reason at 4 am always hungry i’m so hungry i’m so hungry but ew not for that . Plop down in the middle where everybody walks. I see a bird i stare at it i meow at it i do a wiggle come here birdy. Twitch tail in permanent irritation.

Taco cat backwards spells taco cat touch water with paw then recoil in horror

Tuxedo cats always looking dapper kitty kitty spill litter box, scratch at owner, destroy all furniture, especially couch

Cat ipsum dolor sit amet, meowwww, or this human feeds me, i should be a god. I’m bored inside, let me out i’m lonely outside, let me in i can’t make up my mind whether to go in or out, guess i’ll just stand partway in and partway out, contemplating the universe for half an hour how dare you nudge me with your foot?!?! leap into the air in greatest offense! lick left leg for ninety minutes, still dirty curl into a furry donut, attack feet. Chase ball of string. Cough hairball on conveniently placed pants. Mrow destroy couch run outside as soon as door open.